


To Hold On

by orphan_account



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-18
Updated: 2019-06-18
Packaged: 2020-05-14 04:57:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19266325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Himiko was tired and just wanted to go to sleep. It's been a long day, full of reporters and fans constantly pestering them everytime they even breathe outside. It was also the kind of day where her roommates and best friends were both having a bad night. Which, of course, meant Himiko was going to help, because she loved these fools, and they deserved so much better.





	To Hold On

Himiko was tired and just wanted to go to sleep. It's been a long day, full of reporters and fans constantly pestering them everytime they even breathe outside. It was also the kind of day where her roommates and best friends were both having a bad night. Which, of course, meant Himiko was going to help, because she loved these fools, and they deserved so much better.

 

It was something uniquely horrifying, to get out of the killing game, only to be plunged into the real world with people who 'loved' them. The killing games were over, yes, but what a dramatic finale! People were sad to see it go, but what a way to go out, with such a literal _bang_! They had a lot of fans.

 

Himiko both hated them and pitied them.

 

They were given a large sum of money, a ridiculous, stupid amount of money, all for the price of their friends and any chance of a peaceful life not filled with trauma. They all agreed to stay together at the end, buying a modest apartment together, it was all they felt like they could do. No one else would understand, anyways. Himiko couldn't help but notice that the past survivors of the games were mysteriously absent, nonexistent. She couldn't bring herself to look more into it.

 

That wasn't the problem right now, though. Himiko's problem was the fact that Shuichi was staring blankly at a book he wasn't even reading, while Maki was out 'getting groceries' which meant she would come back with milk, eggs, and fresh bruises that made Himiko want to cry out and try and knock sense into her, or hug her so tightly she would stop trying to leave. She couldn't handle anymore loss. 

 

She turned her attention back to Shuichi, thankful that at least one of her friends were easy to convince to go to bed. Himiko sat next to him, easily leaning into his side. Shuichi leaned back, accepting the comfort, even as Himiko gently removed the book from his hands. Looking closer, she could see the mist in his eyes, and the slight tremble in his hands.

 

"Hey." She began softly, getting his attention. Shuichi looked at her, and Himiko could at least appreciate the effort he took to smile and act normal.

 

"Ah, hey, Himiko." It didn't really work, considering he still looked like he was on the verge of tears, and his face was already beginning to turn red.

 

She let out a sigh. "C'mere, you big dummy." Himiko held out her arms, and he fell into them easily. They were both used to this song and dance. "You know you can come to us, right?"

 

"Sorry." Himiko wondered who he was really apologizing to in moments like these.

 

"It's fine." No matter who it was. "Just a bad day, or did something happen?"

 

"Just a day. Maki left again, didn't she?" Shuichi pulled back slightly, his worried, wet eyes meeting her.

 

Himiko pulled a handkerchief from seemingly thin air, instead of answering, she pressed it into his hand. She took his slight laugh as a win, just happy to make him happy. 

 

Shuichi dried his eyes, and Himiko stood up, holding out her hand to him. "Maki won't be back for a while, sleep."

 

"But…"

 

"I can tell that you haven't been sleeping, Shuichi."

 

"Have any of us been?" She winced, that was fair. Himiko usually slept through most of the day, night time being too prone to nightmares, or bouts of insomnia where she could listen to her friends' own terrors. 

 

"We should still try. I mean, Maki picked up those sleeping pills, right? Have you tried them at all?" 

 

Shuichi considered her for a moment, seemingly coming to a conclusion. He sighed softly, then rubbed her head. She leaned into his touch, and he spoke up. "I guess you're right."

 

"Stay with me?" Himiko was sure all of them slept with each other more than by themselves, the few times they were able to sleep at night. A warm body just kept the nightmares at bay, she supposed. It helped that they could wake each other up, if nightmares did happen.

 

"Of course." Shuichi took her hand, and together they ended up in Maki's room. The nights where she goes out are often the same nights she didn't want to be alone, as much as she insisted otherwise.

 

They were all close, physically and emotionally, but at the same time, harsh boundaries and divides existed all the same.

 

Shuichi never initiated comfort, and he would always direct his concern to someone else, even as he accepted the other's attempts at comfort in a way that was almost desperate. He was the one who researched the games that took place before their own, the talent they branded him with insisting he needed to find out. Himiko thinks he must've found out, because Shuichi is so much quieter these days. He never told them what he found, and Himiko found herself reluctant to ask. 

 

Shuichi was reluctant to tell.

 

Maki no longer trusted her own feelings, even as she suffered from the same heartbreak and guilt as the rest of them. The reveal that everything was fake hit her the hardest, Himiko thinks, even if both she and Shuichi have tried multiple times to convince her that just because it was fake to the world, doesn't mean it's fake to her. As they argued that her feelings were still felt by her, and that was important. She reacted to the world that loved violence so much, with violence. Maki wouldn't hesitate to threaten fans that get too close, and Himiko remembers the time Maki decked a fan that made Shuichi a second too uncomfortable. 

 

Himiko just wished she would protect herself more, instead of them.

 

Himiko herself pushes her problems to the back of her mind, in favor of supporting her friends. It was a way of atonement, though she would never say it out loud. A way to make herself useful, helpful, because why was it her that made it out alive? There were so many victims in the game, so many people that she and Maki and Shuichi cared about. _Why_ of all people, of all the lovers and close friends, why did she survive? Himiko couldn't help but feel bad, even if she wanted to live, so did the others. Shuichi and Maki both had people so, so important to them that were dead, that should've been alive instead of Himiko, she can only try and help them both in place of those that can't.

 

It was the least she could do.

 

They all clung to each other and pushed each other away the same. Himiko could only cling to Shuichi's chest, not hesitating to nuzzle into him, and pretend to sleep. Really, she was waiting for Maki. Even as exhaustion weighed her down, she wouldn't be able to sleep knowing that Maki could come back hurt, or worse, that she might not come back at all.

 

The thought made her shiver, which caused Shuichi to gently rub her back, small circles with his thumb. "She'll be fine. She's Maki." He said. The words felt hollow to both of them, but she still tried to relax in his arms.

 

Eventually, Shuichi fell asleep, much to her relief. He deserved to sleep as much as possible, with how little of it he got. It was amazing how he was still standing some days, after several nights of barely any sleep and far too much coffee. Himiko turned around in his arms, so that he was spooning her. She wanted to be able to face Maki when she came back.

 

Thankfully, Himiko wasn't waiting much longer. She could hear the front door opening, then closing with a quiet click. It was only a few moments before the door to the bedroom opened.

 

"Oh." The soft exhalation sounded resigned, slightly guilty.

 

The bed dipped slightly, and Himiko could just barely make out Maki's outline as she changed into her pajamas. "You're still up?" Her voice was low and quiet, careful not to wake up the boy behind her.

 

"Mm… needed to make sure you were okay." Maki made a soft noise in the back of her throat, but she laid down on the bed to face Himiko all the same.

 

Himiko slowly moved her hand to place it on Maki's face, rubbing her thumb against a new bruise. Maki pressed into the touch, but she refused to meet Himiko's eyes. She moved her hand away from Maki's face, grasping at one of her hands.

 

Maki shuffled forward awkwardly until their foreheads touched, she didn't say anything, but Himiko got the message. _It's okay, I'm sorry, I'm okay._ She understood, even if it broke her heart to see her fellow survivor hurt herself this way.

 

"Can we…" She began quietly, messing with Maki's fingers, "Can we talk about this tomorrow?"

 

"..."

 

"Please?" Himiko would drop it if she said no, but she couldn't stand it anymore. She had to do something, anything to help her friends.

 

"... Yeah. Okay." Maki's hand squeezed her own. "Tomorrow."

 

"Tomorrow." She repeated back, finally letting her eyes fall shut for good. 

 

Tomorrow they would talk about it, maybe talk about everything else they need to. There'll be crying, probably shouting too, but Himiko had faith everything was going to be okay. No matter how terrible this world was, they had each other, and Himiko wasn't going to let that go, let them go.

 

Tomorrow they'll talk, but for now, Himiko was content to lay between her two closest friends and finally sleep.


End file.
